Sunday, October 3, 2010

From Our Adoption Blog

I am going over our adoption blog tonight trying to decide whether to make it available to the general public, and if I don't, how to invite/allow those who are interested in reading it to be able to do so. The following is the first post on that blog. God has brought us a loooong way since that wintery day in mid-January of 2009. In fact we're much farther than we ever dreamed we would be at this point, so I will not complain about recent little bumps in the road we have faced because this too shall pass.

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.
Proverbs 16:9

When I think about it, I realize that adoption was always on my heart -- for other people at least. It wasn't until a rather traumatic third pregnancy and post delivery, and two miscarriages later that adoption was beginning to look very special to me personally.

In the end, I did get pregnant again and we had another beautiful, healthy baby girl. Yet, even in those early days the thought of adopting someday was in the back of my mind and tucked away into a neat corner of my heart. The fear of never having another child although a distant memory, never fully went away. We were blessed, we were busy, and yet something was missing.

I knew another pregnancy was out of the question, but my heart ached for another child. Despite the busyness of our lives, I found myself studying adoption blogs on the internet. Reading about children in need of a forever family. Falling in love with photos of sweet children who would love to have a family to call their own.

For awhile, I knew that Murray felt it was not an option, but shortly before Christmas he said to me one evening after I had finished pouring over an adoption blog, that it was time to consider adoption. I was shocked, surprised, excited, overwhelmed. God had a plan for us! A new path for us to be taking.

When it came down to the wire though, I balked. Here I had spent many hours thinking about what it would be like to welcome a Little One who was not our own flesh and blood into our home, and knew that it would be a good thing, but when it came down to actually taking the first step, I was having cold feet. I prayed and waited and prayed and waited. After a few weeks, I began to research, and asking the Lord that if this direction was not from him, but simply from our hearts to close the doors quickly -- and hard.

For the first little bit, it was my job to find out about countries, agencies, fees, etc. It was also going to be my job to make the phone calls to start us on this new path in our lives.

Today was the first big step. I called a specific agency because after much prayer and talking, we see God leading us to the Philippines. We already sponsor two Compassion children in the Philippines and our church sponsors missionaries who work there so it seems only natural to go with a country where we feel a connection.

The agency will be happy to have us, but first we need a social worker. I will sit on our decision for another week, and then find ourselves a social worker.

~Adoption Creed~

Not flesh of my flesh
nor bone of my bone,
but still miraculously my own.

Never forget for a single minute,
that you grew not under my heart,
but in it.

Author Unknown

12 comments:

  1. I enjoyed reading this! God has certainly brought you a long way in this process. It is a joy to anticipate with you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. So glad you shared this Deborah. I have been praying for your little one and for you and Murray as you walk through this process.
    Please join me in prayer for a couple in my mom's church who were set to adopt three siblings from Russia. They have visited them a couple of times in the orphanage and they have brought the children here to the States last summer. They call and talk every week or so. Everything was set but the oldest @ 14 told the judge in Russia that he did not want to be adopted. His two siblings have followed suit. The couple is heart broken.
    I continue to pray for your family, your social worker and the children through this process.
    blessings
    ~a

    ReplyDelete
  3. What a wonderful post! I have seen once where a blogger was going to go private and asked for all those interested to e-mail her and then she would invite those she wished to read her private blog. Maybe that's an idea?

    You have a wonderful story and a wonderful heart!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, I almost forgot...I really love the new blog header!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Very cool!!!!
    I would be interested in reading your adoption blog. I also have a heart for adopting.
    My dad adopted me, and I am very thankful that he did:O)
    Blessings sister!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. That was lovely.

    It's nice to look back at the way things were, what we thought and how we felt, when we can. I'm thankful that I journaled parts of our process before I started blogging.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I love when I hold a verse so close to my heart and then suddenly it "pops up" all the time as I read through blogs, articles etc...! Proverbs 16:9 is a verse I'm clinging to these days. We automatically applied a 2nd time to the Philippines, never even considering maybe the Lord had a child for us elsewhere! We were refused - the Lord closed that door but we feel He has led us in another direction. We had our plans, but the Lord will determine exactly where we will go.

    I'd love to follow your private blog!

    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. It's all the little moments you will have, the moments that build toward eternity. I am so thrilled for you and Murray and all the precious DB's.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Would love in on your new adoption blog! And I think your new header is fabulous. Our leaves are just starting to turn here!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I really enjoyed reading about the first steps and thoughts in your adoption process. I would love to read more. If you do decide to make it a private blog, please include me in your readers!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Deborah... you are such a genuinely good person.

    I don't think there is an adoption in my future, so I probably don't need to read this blog, as long as you keep us updated in your main one :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. I so enjoyed reading this! I don't see adoption in my future, but I am so glad I have been offering my time with the 1st - 6th grade boys on Wed. nights at church. One of the boys (from the family I mentioned before that has 21 children, most international adoptions) has absolutely captured my heart. He is just the cutest, sweetest thing. My boys love him too, so that makes it all the more special.

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I love to hear from my readers!

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...